What you need will be there when you need it is a beautiful Truth. And it can be challenging to hold onto this Truth at times. Especially when we are in the grip of fear. Sometimes I think I really embody this Truth: I trust the universe to provide for me and I am able to stay in the now, where lack cannot exist. Even in the most challenging circumstances, I can often stay grounded and know that, while I may not understand how I will be provided for, I will certainly be provided for. Sometimes, though, this beautiful Truth eludes me. It feels impossibly far away, a dream that I cannot touch or realize. During these times, I watch my behavior that includes taking and using more than I need, stockpiling, overeating, over-planning, and acting in other ways that demonstrate one thing: I don’t trust the universe to have my back.
It may be difficult to embrace this Truth, because inherent to it is an uncommon level of trust: what we need will be here when we need it. And not before. The not before is the tricky bit. To obsess today about what we could need tomorrow removes us from the flow of now, and robs us of the unlimited potential to which we have access. It limits tomorrow’s success to something we envisioned yesterday, whereas tomorrow has a potential we can know nothing about yet.
To truly embrace this truth involves a great letting go of the planning, organizing and managing of ourselves, others and the world around us in order to get our potential future needs met. It involves releasing our anxiety-driven grip on the illusion of control and relaxing into the comfort of knowing you will be taken care of. It involves not telling ourselves stories about future deprivations and instead telling ourselves truths about the breadth and depth of our infinite universe. I think it’s what Jesus was showing us when he turned a few fish and a few loaves of bread into a feast for many.
This is heady stuff! So, to let me take this out of the metaphysical and down into the very physical. When I went to buy toilet paper last Thursday, I was baffled to see empty shelves. It didn’t take long for me to learn about the toilet paper hoarding that was going on. I had to laugh, because my husband and I have a habit of buying the huge 24 pack of rolls and then not thinking about it again for weeks and weeks. We missed our opportunity by one day.
I have cruised Amazon and ventured into the aisles of CVS a couple of times. I experience a shot of panic every time I realize I can’t get more toilet paper. The panic fades, though. I have enough for today. And what an opportunity for me to practice this beautiful truth. What I need will be here when I need it. And not before. I look in my bathroom drawer, and there are these rolls. Here when I need them.